"And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Kemper that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Travis too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married... But then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll, I'll, I'll set the building on fire... "
Also:
"The ratio of people to cake is too big."
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